There’s this boy, and he’s eight.
And he knows exactly when to curl up on the couch and play quietly alone. He knows exactly when he needs to shut this world out for a bit.
That little boy is my son.
A sweet-spirited kid, but slow, slow to adjust. He is always the quietest one in the class. Never wants to raise his hand. Never wants any attention. Always the observer. A true introvert. Some may even say, painfully shy.
We love him for who he is, but it can be challenging.
I know introverts are everywhere. As I have gotten older, I am surprisingly more introverted than I realize.
But lately, I find myself worried about my boy. Granted, it is not the shyness that breaks my heart. It’s the fears, the limits he puts on himself, the growing insecurity. Will he ever come out of that shell?
Providentially, he came home with a little card that his teacher gave him the other day. It said, “I just want you to know that I love having you in my class! Always remember that God made you special.”
That was it. It was just an out of the blue note.
But those gentle words hit me hard.
And I thought of Moses.
Moses was a quieter soul, an introvert even. He had no confidence in his voice. None. When God told Moses to return to Egypt and demand the release of the Israelites from slavery, he protested that he was not eloquent, that he was in fact, slow of speech and tongue (Exodus 4:10).
But what was God’s response? Did He say , “You’re right, Moses. You are way too socially awkward for this. I need someone with more charisma.”
Not at all.
He spoke right into Moses’ insecure spirit…I have made you, I know you, and whether or not you feel able, I have chosen you (Exodus 3:14).
Inarguably, Moses ended up uniquely positioned for the task. As we know, with the help of his brother Aaron and ultimately God’s almighty hand, he led the great Exodus, forged through the parted sea, and helped to bring the Israelites to the Promise Land.
And never once in all of this did God ask Moses to be someone he was not — to take on a new personality, to be more like his brother. God merely asked him to be willing.
Not an easy task for sure – but it does bring me comfort.
On the world’s stage, it seems the ones who are the loudest, most confident, up front and center, are the most impactful.
But in God’s ministry, the kingdom gets turned upside down a bit. In fact, God appears to intentionally use the ones who are less assured of themselves, with less to boast about, to accomplish His great things. He uses the preacher as much as the chair stacker, the social butterfly as much as the one who musters courage to talk to one.
I would be lying if I said I am not worried about how my son will navigate this loud world. I do hope that one day he might just come out of his shell and surprise us all. But I suspect he will always have a quiet nature. As his mom, I must remind myself this is not something to “fix” but rather embrace. I want him to believe that he is fearfully and wonderfully made, as with everyone else, for a unique purpose.
But I do pray hard – that somehow he will also know when it is right to step out of his comfort zone. He will detect the fine line between what is his personality and what is actually fear. He will discern when remaining too quiet, reserved or immobilized is actually sin. And he will heed what is good and brave, no matter the inner protests. I want him to learn to trust boldly in a God that is bigger than him. And to find sweet freedom in that.
When I think about it, when it comes to our life’s calling, whether we are introverted, extroverted, or somewhere in between, the thing that is most important is our willingness to be used by a faithful God, no matter how intimidating the sea… no matter how great the exodus.
invited by grace 
Oh, parents don’t have it easy with all their worries. Well, I was a quite timid child when I was 8 as well. But life shapes us all the time. I’m still an introvert but there’s no such thing as a total outcast. I mean, I love spending time on my own and it helps me maintain my balance, but I like being around people as well. I know that I need them and that all of us are creators who should support one another. So I guess it will also come to your son, the realisation, all that you wrote. He has your support and faith, so whatever future brings, he will develop. 🙂
Thank you for your encouragement and wise words. You are right that life is shaping us all the time. How we are at 8 is very different from how we might be when we are grown… and even then, we are constantly changing and learning things about ourselves and this world. Like you, my son does genuinely like to be with others…. and when he is comfortable, he can be silly and fun. But he needs that quiet down time too. 🙂
This is a lovely post. Your son is just beginning his journey, but someday he will find something that will bring him outside of his shell. I teach drama to kids and find the quiet ones to open up on stage. It sounds as though you have placed him in God’s hands and that will help more than anything.
I do hope so! Someone just mentioned to me… how about putting him in drama? 🙂 My first reaction is… I can’t ever imagine that!! But you never know. I’m so glad that God has my son in His hands…. and He can be trusted. 🙂 Thank you for your comment!
My four boys are all along the bandwidth from calm to boisterous, and I have had the same misgivings along the way about their unfolding temperaments, but it is a blessing to see their individuality blossom and to witness the hand of God in their lives, providing opportunities that match their abilities and their nature. Blessings to you.
I cannot thank you enough for sharing. Raising kids is such a sobering job! But a beautiful one… over and over again, God washes me with His grace and shows me how He can be trusted. Still I fight worry everyday. There’s nothing more that brings me to my knees than being a momma to my three kids. I am so glad that you have seen God’s hand work in your boys’ lives. I know I will see this, too… I am beginning to see glimpses, in fact.
Yes, we see God working in us, and, miraculously, in our kids — often in spite of us.
He sure does. In meaningful ways, too!
Thank you, Eric! I agree! 🙂
This is so encouraging as an introvert myself! Thank you!
I am glad that you were encouraged. That means a lot to me! 🙂
Thank you for sharing about your son! It’s a beautiful and much needed message for us to take to heart – we are needed, useful, and exquisite just how God created us for his delight and purpose. God uses the quiet, the weak, and the imperfect indeed.
I like how you mention that God has created us for his delight and purpose. It is really something to remember that He delights in us… not just tolerates us, but actually delights. That’s a beautiful thought – one that I forget at times!
What a sweet note from a caring teacher, and what a powerful lesson. God certainly seems to call us in our weakness. I love how you said he uses the preacher as much as the chair stacker. We are all needed! Often the most timid can have the greatest impact of all.
I agree Chelsi… my son has a terrific teacher. 🙂 When I read that little note that he brought home in his backpack… I was near tears. Sometimes we just need that reminder. “Often the most timid can have the greatest impact of all”… I am beginning to see that this is more true than ever.
What a great reminder how God uses the meek and weak to accomplish great and awesome things in His Kingdom! And what a sweet teacher he has! We need more like her in our schools!
Megan…. we do feel quite blessed to have her as a teacher! 🙂 God does use the most unassuming of all to accomplish His works…. I think it goes back to us being really like fragile jars of clay, simple vessels…. not so strong on our own merit, but when willing, we can be used to hold the treasure of Christ.
This is so beautiful, Kim. What a beautiful reminder that God accepts us fully and loves us for who we are. Unlike the world, everyone is celebrated for exactly who they are, with no pressure to fit in. Beautiful post! 🙂 God uses the humble follows of God, whatever personality they possess.
Marla, that’s very true…the world is constantly asking us to conform to be the latest and greatest…yet, God accepts us right where we are. That’s the power of His grace and love. Humility and the obedience to follow… that’s also key. Love your thoughts! Thank you. 🙂
So love this too:) my just nineyear old son is exactly how you describe your guy- so so sweet and gentle and soft spoken– my heart has broken many times over the years- not from who he is, but reaction from the world that doesnt value ‘very’ different. It is a special gift and burden to have these little ones in our care, prayer is exactly what we need- spot on:) love the moses connection too- God is the creator, i find myself constantly saying this to my oldest who is polar opposite– 🙂
Thank you for sharing about your own little guy. How we can relate. You are right the world doesn’t necessarily value the more timid and quiet ones… but I do believe strongly that it’s these ones God can use in surprisingly loud ways. Prayer is my lifeline as a mom. 🙂
Ooo nice–God can use in loud ways- love 🙂